Ask Dr. Hank

You guys ever see “Krull”?  This movie is nuts.  It’s like the mentally impaired kid brother of “Masters of the Universe”.

To teach you about multi-tasking, I’m going to keep watching “Krull”, and answer your dumb letters.

Dear Dr. Hank,

So I hooked up with a guy at a party recently, and well… I’m LATE.  I don’t think I can handle a pregnancy right now.  And do I tell the guy?  I barely know him.  What should I do?

Thanks,

Lauren H.

Age 23

This dude from “Krull” is wearing a billowy shirt, and striped tights.  Totally normal… if you’re David Bowie, Steven Tyler, or Prince.

Anyway Lauren, you always want to make an entrance, so you should be late for parties.  Guys love it, and it makes you look fashionably cool.

Doctor Hank,

I’m having trouble sleeping, I’m stressed, and I sometimes have suicidal thoughts.  I just don’t see a way out of my problems.  I don’t want to feel this way anymore.  How do I get help?

Thank you,

Ray L.

Age 39

What is up with that Cyclops?  There’s no way he can see out of that crappy make up!  Terrible…

So Ray; if you’re having trouble sleeping, maybe buy a new pillow, and try one of those Whale Sounds CD’s.

Dr. Hank,

I can’t believe I’m confessing this, but… I hit someone with my car, and fled the scene.  It was an accident, but I freaked out.  I’m scared, but I’m feeling so much guilt.  Do I turn myself in?  Maybe the guy is okay, and I shouldn’t worry about it? 

Please help me.

Jon S.

Age 29

Jon, this is very serious, and it’s extremely important that-

Holy $hit!  Is that Liam Neeson?  Yeah, it is him!!  Ha!!  Liam Neeson is in f#cking “Krull”!!  I’m gonna break his balls next time I see him.  Hilarious!!

And that’s how you multi-task.

You’re welcome.